Every guy asks himself this question at least half a million times before reaching the ripe old age of seventeen. Turns out what we thought they wanted — bad boy, bulging biceps, rippling abs — didn’t even come close.

What do women want? They want…women:

Two male faces, one more masculine and one more feminine, were presented side by side and the participants were asked to select the face they thought showed more of particular traits including dominance, ambition, wealth, faithfulness, commitment, parenting ability and warmth.

Faces with more masculine features (such as a square jaw, larger nose and smaller eyes), were judged to me more dominant, less faithful, worse parents and as having less warm personalities than those with more feminine features (such as fuller lips, wide eyes and thinner, more curved eyebrows).

Except, you know, for brief flings when the eggs are boiling:

Another recent study found that women who were in the fertile stage of their menstrual cycle preferred more masculine-looking males for short-term relationships, but more feminine-looking males while they were less fertile.

This just proves the hypothesis that guys tend to put forward by the age of twenty. No matter who you are or what you look like, you cannot win!

But the research does explain why chicks dig the New York Yankees:


(I’ll stretch any point to take a shot at the Yankees…)