squirrel.jpgI admit that rodent eating has been a long time hang-up – even an obsession . That I share a country with squirrel eaters disturbs me; but personally knowing squirrel eaters fills me with a sense of unease too deep to quantify. But the plain fact is: Mizzur-uhns eat squirrels. (Which is all the more reason to never leave the safe boundaries of New England)

Eating squirrels is bad enough, but Mizzur-uhns live in a culture that accepts such behavior as normal and even encouraged! We should probably consider ceding the whole damned state back to France…

Here’s the Missouri Department of Conservation website on “ettin them thar varmints”: A Squirrel Cuisine:

People who frown on squirrels as food can be placed into two groups—those who can’t stomach the thought of eating an animal that’s furry and cute and those who have eaten squirrels but found them less than appetizing. The first group will probably never enjoy eating squirrels. The second can be won over if hunters avoid these mistakes.

[snip]

I have eaten squirrels that tasted gamy, though tasted bad is a more accurate description. The squirrels had been shot through the abdominal cavity and poorly cleaned. Any meat will taste bad if allowed to marinate in gut contents and urine, and that is exactly what happens when gut and bladder contents touch the meat, be it squirrel or any other game animal.

[snip: Don’t forget that this website is run by the State of Missouri!]

More squirrels than not are placed on the dinner table with hair clinging to the meat, which is unappetizing to say the least. Skinning squirrels is difficult, regardless of how you go about it, and hair is easily transferred to the meat. My skinning method, however, handles the problem.

Ok, enough… This can go on all day and I want to cut to the most important part of the article – the recipes!

That particular section contains such delicacies as: Squirrel & Dumplings, Barbecued Squirrel (You knew that was coming…), Squirrel Spaghetti, Squirrel Italian, and, of course, Pan fried squirrel.

But here’s my fav:

Squirrel Salad

  • Boil 6 squirrels until tender.
  • The last five minutes of cooking time, add 3 eggs still in their shells.
  • Remove squirrels and eggs from pot and let cool.
  • De-bone squirrels. Peel eggs. In a food processor, grind meat and eggs separately. Place in a large bowl and with a spoon or fork, mix in mayonnaise or sandwich spread and pickle relish to desired consistency and taste.
  • Serve on toast or crackers with your favorite garnish.

cookedsquirrel.jpgYou just gotta wonder what squirrel eaters would choose as a favorite garnish. Anyway, if you have no plans this weekend, why not pot up a batch of Squirrel Salad and invite your first cousins over for a rodent feast that’s guaranteed to please! (That is, as long as you have a tall stack of country music CDs and plenty of Pabst Blue Ribbon on tap)

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