And so’s the guy with the cell phone cam…

Ok, so you’re a new Altar Boy and your young priest is about about to offer his first Solemn High Mass. His grueling years of seminary philosophy and theology are behind him. He can read Aquinas in Latin. He’s endured a four hour Ordination ceremony and even though he’s only 28 years old, his old Little League coach calls him Father.

You are in awe!

You’ve practiced this ritual- your role – for months. Your family is in the church. They’re all so proud of you – dreaming of the day when they come to your first Solemn Mass.
It’s zero hour. The Knights of Columbus get into position:


Your family, friends, and all the parishioners are gathered inside the church:


You line up for the procession, feverishly running the Latin responses through your brain. Can’t make a mistake. Can’t drop the ball.

But there’s one bit of business that you have to take care of before the two and a half hour Mass gets underway. It’s hot. People are nervous, distracted; nobody’s watching you…

So little Timmy, you go for the Gold!


And no one’s the wiser…