Speak English

As political Neanderthals go, I’m pretty enlightened on the subject of immigration. When America attracts smart, hard-working people who are committed to bettering themselves and raising their families’ standard of living, we all benefit. Open wide the gate and let them pass! But on the way in, please remind them to learn English.

Yesterday the mayor of Newark, New Jersey (Cory Booker, pictured at right) held a press conference to announce the arrest of a particularly vicious murderer. Good on the Newark police, kudos to the mayor, etc. but halfway through the appearance — in response to a question posed in English – His Honor responded in Spanish and it was all downhill from there.

I’m sure we were all very much impressed with the mayor’s language skills but I don’t understand Spanish – I had no idea what the man was saying and, to be frank, it pissed me off. The three victims of this horrible crime were black and their families (who are very much entitled to an explanation from city officials) speak ENGLISH. As should the mayor; as should everyone else who makes America his home either by birth or by choice.

Even though I worship at the altar of a Mexican-American, I’m sure I’ll be accused of racism but I’ll take that risk. For the moment, I’ll skip the language as unifier spiel and cut to the results of a new diversity study:

IT HAS BECOME increasingly popular to speak of racial and ethnic diversity as a civic strength. From multicultural festivals to pronouncements from political leaders, the message is the same: our differences make us stronger.

But a massive new study, based on detailed interviews of nearly 30,000 people across America, has concluded just the opposite. Harvard political scientist Robert Putnam — famous for “Bowling Alone,” his 2000 book on declining civic engagement — has found that the greater the diversity in a community, the fewer people vote and the less they volunteer, the less they give to charity and work on community projects. In the most diverse communities, neighbors trust one another about half as much as they do in the most homogenous settings. The study, the largest ever on civic engagement in America, found that virtually all measures of civic health are lower in more diverse settings.

[snip]

Putnam claims the US has experienced a pronounced decline in “social capital,” a term he helped popularize. Social capital refers to the social networks — whether friendships or religious congregations or neighborhood associations — that he says are key indicators of civic well-being. When social capital is high, says Putnam, communities are better places to live. Neighborhoods are safer; people are healthier; and more citizens vote.

The results of his new study come from a survey Putnam directed among residents in 41 US communities, including Boston. Residents were sorted into the four principal categories used by the US Census: black, white, Hispanic, and Asian. They were asked how much they trusted their neighbors and those of each racial category, and questioned about a long list of civic attitudes and practices, including their views on local government, their involvement in community projects, and their friendships. What emerged in more diverse communities was a bleak picture of civic desolation, affecting everything from political engagement to the state of social ties.

And it goes on from there…

I’m actually a big fan of ethnic diversity. I grew up with Lebanese-Americans and by the time I was ten I was familiar with a few common Arabic expressions. The Christmas celebrations of my childhood were enriched by exposure to Swedish customs and during young adulthood I supped with the Poles on December 24th. Ethnic diversity, properly understood, is a wonderful thing. The problem arises with the imposition of an exclusive (read: excluding) alien sub-culture that fails to engage the dominant culture by means of that great unifying force: a common language.

If the first generation of immigrants has a problem with the lingua franca, I can sympathize. The fact that Grandma speaks Russian, or French, or Spanish at home won’t toll the death knell of the Republic. But when the second — and even third and fourth — generations still need an interpreter to buy a loaf of bread then we run the risk of a devastating social fragmentation that could eventually destroy this country.

 

Squirrel. “It’s what’s for dinner”

I admit that rodent eating has been a long time hang-up – even an obsession . That I share a country with squirrel eaters disturbs me; but personally knowing squirrel eaters fills me with a sense of unease too deep to quantify. But the plain fact is: Mizzur-uhns eat squirrels. (Which is all the more reason to never leave the safe boundaries of New England)

Eating squirrels is bad enough, but Mizzur-uhns live in a culture that accepts such behavior as normal and even encouraged! We should probably consider ceding the whole damned state back to France…

Here’s the Missouri Department of Conservation website on “ettin them thar varmints”: A Squirrel Cuisine:

People who frown on squirrels as food can be placed into two groups—those who can’t stomach the thought of eating an animal that’s furry and cute and those who have eaten squirrels but found them less than appetizing. The first group will probably never enjoy eating squirrels. The second can be won over if hunters avoid these mistakes.

[snip]

I have eaten squirrels that tasted gamy, though tasted bad is a more accurate description. The squirrels had been shot through the abdominal cavity and poorly cleaned. Any meat will taste bad if allowed to marinate in gut contents and urine, and that is exactly what happens when gut and bladder contents touch the meat, be it squirrel or any other game animal.

[snip: Don't forget that this website is run by the State of Missouri!]

More squirrels than not are placed on the dinner table with hair clinging to the meat, which is unappetizing to say the least. Skinning squirrels is difficult, regardless of how you go about it, and hair is easily transferred to the meat. My skinning method, however, handles the problem.

Ok, enough… This can go on all day and I want to cut to the most important part of the article – the recipes!

That particular section contains such delicacies as: Squirrel & Dumplings, Barbecued Squirrel (You knew that was coming…), Squirrel Spaghetti, Squirrel Italian, and, of course, Pan fried squirrel.

But here’s my fav:

Squirrel Salad

• Boil 6 squirrels until tender.
• The last five minutes of cooking time, add 3 eggs still in their shells.
• Remove squirrels and eggs from pot and let cool.
• De-bone squirrels. Peel eggs. In a food processor, grind meat and eggs separately. Place in a large bowl and with a spoon or fork, mix in mayonnaise or sandwich spread and pickle relish to desired consistency and taste.
• Serve on toast or crackers with your favorite garnish.

You just gotta wonder what squirrel eaters would choose as a favorite garnish. Anyway, if you have no plans this weekend, why not pot up a batch of Squirrel Salad and invite your first cousins over for a rodent feast that’s guaranteed to please! (That is, as long as you have a tall stack of country music CDs and plenty of Pabst Blue Ribbon on tap)

 

When Woolworth’s was WalMart

Really interesting article on the rise and fall of Woolworth’s – the grandmother of American chain stores.

The author, reasonably, chalks up its demise to the great Suburban Migration following the Second World War and its inability to finesse its business model to adapt to the new circumstances:

By 2000, shortly after Woolworth boarded up its last stores, an outright majority of Americans were suburbanites. Firms like Woolworth had trouble adapting their cut-rate downtown model to the new suburban shopping centers that sprang up around the country. The company stuck to an updated version of the old five-and-ten even as postwar affluence brought a higher standard of living to many of its customers. So it couldn’t compete with new outlets designed for the shopping centers and malls, like Kmart, Target and Wal-Mart, all three of which came into being in 1962 and offered more household goods at bargain prices. By 1970 those “big-box” budget retailers, to be joined later by new discount franchises like Toys “R” Us, Circuit City, T. J. Maxx, Office Depot, and Best Buy, outsold traditional department stores as well as five-and-tens and rang a final death knell for the downtown business districts that Woolworth had long dominated.

A once seemingly invincible retail leviathan — that sounded the death knell for Mom & Pop stores long before Sam Walton took his first step — went toes up because they couldn’t adapt to the post-war box store tsunami.

What the author didn’t ask (and what he really should have asked) was whether there was any scenario under which WalMart might be similarly vulnerable?

We went from corner stores, to downtown chain stores, to suburban mega-stores and most people (judging by the anti-WalMart angst so prevalent in certain circles) seem to think we’ve reached the end of retail history.

But I think that web based shopping may threaten WalMart (and its clones) every bit as much as the rise of box stores threatened — and ultimately destroyed — the venerable old Five & Dimes of yesteryear.

At least I hope it does